Top Ten... Hale Yeah

Published on January 25th, 2013 | by Hale Yeah


Hale Yeah

Top Ten Ways You Know You’re at a Derby Skater’s Super Bowl Party

10. The San Francisco 49ers are referred to as “B.A.D.’s team”

9. The house is open to you, except one room locked tight that holds in the derby gear …and the derby gear smell.

8. Spend half the game arguing for/against how much cooler football would be on skates.

7. While the other half of the time is spent on making up derby names for the players.

6. Some at the party are stunned when a team of 53 players win – and yet not a single one attempts to start a victory pyramid.

5. With each play being about 6 seconds long, with 40 seconds in between plays, most there are sure their derby team could play football for a full 12 hours without getting winded.

4. Baltimore’s helmets are a big let down after having seen Charm City’s helmets.

3. Super Bowl Halftime Entertainment: Beyonce. Eastern Regional Championship Game Halftime Entertainment: London and Charm performing Gangman Style. Advantage: roller derby

2. Most of the attendees feel Jim Nantz & Phil Simms seem incredibly knowledgeable, but think they both need about 5 Red Bulls in order to have the enthusiasm worthy of derby announcers.

1. Everyone goes to a second location for a Super Bowl Party After Party.

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