Published on August 29th, 2012 | by DerbyLife0
Derbylife Writing Contest: “DerbyLife? Derby is life…” by Folsom Bruise
I’m at a pivotal point in my life. I just graduated from college. I just bought a brand new car. I began a new career job. But I’m miserable.
My brand new job is not only an hour away from my home and my friends, but an hour and half away from practice and anything derby related. That doesn’t even include the traffic. Don’t even get me started on the traffic. They want me to move. I’ve missed eight practices in the last two months; forget about even making it to PR events. Ugh!
My brain has been hurting, agonizing.
This is the career job I have been waiting for. Is it really time for me to grow up and leave derby by the wayside. No, I could never do that; derby is a part of my life now. Am I being selfish? My long-time boyfriend keeps telling me work should come first, derby second. But, why don’t I feel that way? Why I feel like derby is more important than my job? Why do I want to drop $500 on a pair of skates when I am super-gluing my sneakers back together? What the hell is wrong with me?
Oh yeah, when I started playing roller derby, I began exercising for the first time since I was a kid. Geez, that’s right; when I started playing roller derby I learned how to have fun on a Tuesday night without involving some type of alcohol. Forgive me if I am wrong, but I think I made about 70 new friends over the last two years. Oh, did I not sternum-block the crap out of a jammer two weeks ago and land her ass on the ground? I DID!
Roller derby has become something so much more to me than just that hobby I do on the side, and I think that goes for every derby girl out there. It’s like a part of my childhood that disappeared; that fierce, unstoppable, nothing-can-hold-me down attitude that died somewhere along the way between car payments and night classes. Derby has revived that spirit that was hidden somewhere deep down.
Maybe I should get off the couch and do crunches? Why not take the dogs for a jog around the block? I think I might tweak my trucks a little bit tonight, you know, live my life on the edge.
Maybe I am a bit selfish for wanting more derby in my life, but it makes me happy. Sure, I’m know that money brings happiness too, but 10 years down the road, am I going to be happy that I gave up something I loved for a career that may or may-not have turned out okay?
Whatever, I’m done dwelling on it. I put my two-weeks in this morning. Maybe, I’m making the wrong choice. Maybe this ruins the shot I had at my dream career as a famous print journalist turned magazine editor and publisher. But, all I know is my team is counting on me to be at practice tomorrow night, and you bet your ass I’m going to be there.
Folsom Bruise began skating with the CT RollerGirls in 2011 and became a team member of their B-Team, The Yankee Brutals, in 2012. Roller derby quickly became an important part of Folsom’s life in her last year of college and is in huge life transitions at the time being. She hopes that by holding onto roller derby, everything else will eventually fall into place. Her favorite new trick is landing perfect sternum blocks and she really, really wants a pair of Antiks for Christmas.
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